TEN REASONS SANTA CLAUS
CAN'T
BE A
GHANAIAN...
If he was a Ghanaian, then the
... gifts wud've gotten to us by new year and not 24th. This b'cos.... 1.
ECG will put out the light n he'll
not find his suit till the lights
come
on.
2. When the lights come on, he'll get in the shower and realise the
tap is not flowing. 3. His flight will
be delayed for 3
days. (Thats wen he's lucky)
4. He's gonna get stuck in traffic
for hours. 5. Taxi and trotro drivers will
insult him very very well, like;
"Kwasia
man, where u dey carry all this
bola bola dey go, come block
road" 6. Ghana police will arrest and
charge him for overspeeding and
overloading.
7.He'll never find his way through
Ghana, he'll be stuck in Nima,
totally lost. 8. That dude can't carry that
large
bag on his back n get to his
destination safely. Its either he
looses the bag or get some
cutlass wounds. 9. First word he'll hear wen he
lands in Nima, "Hey! Duuba! wo
k)
he! Firi bag no mu na fa ma me!!
Issifu hia no)ma no.
10. Finally, Evn if he should make it
to the house, your father will
wake up n find him and start
shouting, "Awi oh! awi oh!! awi
oh!!!. Neighbours will corner him
and lynch him. He'll be dead by now. Lol
A
husband was stung by a bee on the p'nis and it became swollen.his wife
prayed"oh lord remove of the pain and leave the size as it is.
What would have
happened if it had been
three Wise Women instead
of three Wise Men?
They would have asked
... directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby,
cleaned the stable, made a
casserole, and brought
practical gifts. But what they would have
said when they left...? "Did you see the sandals
Mary was wearing with
that gown?"
"That baby doesn't look
anything like Joseph!"
"Virgin, my arse! I knew her in school!"
"Can you believe that they
let all of those disgusting
animals in the house?"
"I heard that Joseph isn't
even working right now!" "And that donkey that they
are riding has seen better
days too!"..
MoM SaYs “AlChOhOl iS YoUr
eNeMy" ,
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Jesus says “lOvE YoUr
eNeMy” ;)
An elderly man from USA went on
vacation with his constantly
nagging, greedy and self-centered
wife to Jerusalem.
Just after two days she passed
... away.
They asked him if he would love
to bury her there for $120 or ship
her home for $345,980?
He tells the rabbi "Ship her home!"
Rabbi: But sir, it's cheap to bury
her here .
Elderly man: It's fine, but I want to
ship her home!
Rabbi: Are you sure sir, you want
to spend that much money to ship
her to the USA, rather then bury
her here in the holy land?
Elderly man: Rabbi I will loan,
borrow and steal to just bury her
home.
Rabbi: You truly loved her. A man
like you is rare.
Elderly man: No Rabbi, 2000 YEARS
AGO A MAN(JESUS) WAS BURIED HERE.
AFTER 3 DAYS, HE WOKE UP, I JUST
DON'T WANNA TAKE MY CHANCES
WITH HER!!!!!!
Man: My wife is short of sense and scares a lot from water.
Friend: But how do you know this?
Man: Yesterday, when i reached home, she was in bath tub with the security guard!!
Husband: I am sure that your brain is as good as new..
Wife: How can you say that?
Husband: Because you never used it!
